2to40

It's suddenly only two weeks to 40, and recently I've been asked a lot about how my list is doing. I'm pretty impressed with myself - of the 22 things on the list, I've completed 13, I'm part-way through another five, and the other four... probably not going to happen.More details on how I'm doing with the 22 are below. Just as important, though, is whether with two weeks to go, I feel that I've got what I wanted to get from this experience, and - cringe cringe - what I've learnt about myself. 

To answer that first part - if I got the experience I wanted - I'm really glad I did this. I feel I'll look back on the year, and the blog, and be glad that I marked it and that I actively did a few things that I've thought about doing for a long time. Most of all I'm glad I did the happiness jar. It's such a simple concept, so easy to do, and my jar is now full of little notes of things that have made me happy over the last 38 weeks. I don't remember what any of them were so am really really excited to read them all on my birthday, I think that's going to be really lovely.

If there was something on my list that I decided I didn't want to do, I haven't wasted any time feeling obliged to do it anyway. I'm just not going to do it. Less straightforward has been when I haven't been able to find, or make, the time to do the things that I've really wanted to do. I've realised, partly due to this exercise, that my life at the moment really doesn't allow for me to have much free time. To an extent I've always felt as thought that was a bit of an excuse and that there's plenty of opportunity for me to make time if I want to. But I've come to accept that even though I have a lot of help from family, I still have three children, one of whom is a toddler, a job, a husband who is fantastic when he's at home but isn't at home a few days every week - and that really does limit the literal time, and the headspace, to do as much of this list as I'd have liked. So I'm not going to learn to juggle. I'm not going to learn to say hello in any languages I don't know yet. And I'm certainly not going to go a week without coffee. Probably ever.

The original list is here and this is how it's going:

Completed: the happiness jar; the week without chocolate and TV; the documentaries, graphic design, affirmations, and drawing a face; raising money for charity; working with a community charity; Benjy and Chloë's requests for me to tidy a bookcase and go to York Museum; I've been to a gig (Ed and I in student-ville on a Monday night); and I knitted something (photo below!).

In progress: the non-fiction book. This is not going well at all! You may remember that Ed narrowed it down to four books for me to choose from, here, and I chose 'What's Left'. Well I never got past page 15. Just wasn't going to happen. So a couple of weeks ago I changed my book choice and started reading 'The Road to Wigan Pier' instead. That's not going well either! I think this is one that will end up on the 'not going to do it after all' list.

Also in progress is the reading more than watching TV. Again, not going brilliantly - frankly I'm just too tired - but I've re-instated a book club that I used to be in before Erin was born which I think will give me the motivation I need. The post-natal exercises are going well, I'm due to give blood for my second time in this 40 weeks the day after tomorrow, and I'm doing OK on the piano piece - although I can see that extending beyond my birthday and into - well, well into - the next year.

Not happening. A week without coffee - nope. Juggling - nope. Learning to say hello in lots of languages - nope. And not saying anything negative for a day, once a month - not sure I like what it says about me but I never even wanted to try this one! As an aside, the hello in other languages thing was, at one point, changed to learning basic Italian before our holiday there this summer. I still plan to do that, but don't feel I can really say it's in progress yet.

Here's a photo of the knitting. Explanation first. I really enjoyed knitting, really really enjoyed it. But it takes a looooong time. And as I sat knitting I couldn't help but think of all the other things I should and could be doing. So I decided I'd knit fingerless gloves, that's pretty quick. Then I changed it to a scarf for Chloë; then a scarf for Erin; then a headband for Erin; then in the end, it ended up being a headband for Erin's doll! But I did it! I knitted something!